I was looking through some old files this morning when I stumbled on this bit of doggerel that I wrote a few years ago.
I had overheard my wife helping her mom with a Web browser problem, and the cadence of my wife’s voice as she spelled out a URL made the light bulb go off. And about twenty minutes later, I had it all written down.
As Sirius Cybernetics Corporation would say: “share and enjoy . . . ”
The MP3 Song
(To the tune of “Man Piaba”)
With apologies to Harry Belafonte
When I was a lad of three-foot-three
Certain questions occurred to me,
So I asked me father quite seriously
How to download the MP3.
He stammered and he stuttered pathetically
And this is what he said to me.
He said, “Son, when the WAN piaba and the LAN piaba
and the JPEG Flash Java Ethernet,
the WYSIWYG, thirty gig, bury Digg uhmm,
H T T P Co-lon Slash Slash.”
Well, it was clear as mud but it covered the ground
And the confusion made the brain go ’round.
I search for the answer quite seriously,
So I go to ask Mr. Tim Berners-Lee.
He said “Son, from the day I invent the World Wide Web
The search for information, it never ebb
Everything’s accessible with language extensible
Find all your ancestors in a Google search
No need to go to the Mormon Church
So if the Consortium agree,
I am positive that you will see
That the WAN piaba and the LAN piaba
and the JPEG Flash Java Ethernet,
the WYSIWYG, thirty gig, bury Digg uhmm,
H T T P Co-lon Slash Slash.”
It was clear as mud but it covered the ground
And the confusion made the brain go ’round.
I surfed the ‘Net for more wise men
And found Mr. Jakob Nielsen
He said “Son, the way you design for your interface
Is to make sure to put everything in its place
It is my responsibility to care about usability
The biggest thing that I espouse
Is understanding the way you browse
It all starts with design fundamentals
To reach your site’s full potentials.
So that the WAN piaba and the LAN piaba
and the JPEG Flash Java Ethernet,
the WYSIWYG, thirty gig, bury Digg uhmm,
H T T P Co-lon Slash Slash.”
Well I surfed high and I surfed low
And I still had no idea how to make download
The uber-geeks upon this earth
Have confused me since my birth
I’ve been over land and been over sea
Trying to find answer ’bout the MP3
But now that they are no longer free
I don’t give a damn you see
If the WAN piaba and the LAN piaba
and the JPEG Flash Java Ethernet,
the WYSIWYG, thirty gig, bury Digg uhmm,
H T T P Co-lon Slash Slash!
— lyrics by Paul Lagasse, protected by the parody provisions of Fair Use
